TWO crucial spiritual disciplines YOU can practice every day!

Hey brothers and sisters,  I have been thinking and praying through this and I believe God has given me this word for myself and quite possibly a word for someone reading this blog.

As always, when someone says they have a word from the Lord, test it to see how it stacks up with Truth.

As saints, we are being called to practice the SPIRITUAL DISCIPLINES OF HUMBLE TRANSPARENCY AND SURRENDER (described in the passage below) now and in the days to come.

I’m humbled and in awe of how DEEP and WIDE and UNCONDITIONAL God’s love is for us that He would put these words into the Bible, HIS WORD (the Sword of the Spirit, the Bread of Life) to call us to holiness through Jesus.

This passage pierced me this morning and I am praying it will pierce all of us as it applies.

Psalm 139:23-24 (NLT)
Search me, O God, and know my heart;
test me and know my anxious thoughts.
Point out anything in me that offends You,
and lead me along the path of everlasting life.

What a humble request for King David to make of God! 

Search me! TRANSPARENCY

Know me! TRANSPARENCY

Point out my wrongdoing!  HUMILITY

Test my thoughts! HUMILITY

After all, how are we able to recognize sin unless God points it out?

Then, when God shows us our sin, we can repent and be forgiven.

Make the above passage your personal prayer every day and let us know how He transforms you in the process.

If you ask the Lord to search your heart, your thoughts, and reveal your sin, you will be continuing in God’s “way everlasting.”

Are fatherless boys the enemy?

In light of recent school shootings, certain categories of children are getting negative attention — namely boys, fatherless boys, adopted boys, and homeschooled boys.

Perhaps it is time to share how proud I am of my oldest child, now a young man of 18 years, who is still homeschooled and has been fatherless his whole life.

This week, my homeschooled, high-school junior put in over 40 hours at work. His managers know he is reliable and willing to take extra shifts when someone calls in sick or quits without notice.

Additionally, in spite of painful flat feet and severely pronated ankles (including the unique pain associated with the 3 braces he wears to mitigate those issues), my son literally stood in the gap at work.

Even with all that comes in such a busy week, he protected his Tuesday night youth group time. Plus, with one more year of high school left, my oldest son has kept up with his Bible study, his junior-year school work, his chores at home, and he still engages with his younger sibs when he gets home from work (even though he’s exhausted).

My fatherless, homeschooled son isn’t perfect, but this treasured gift from God is becoming a man of God with a servant’s heart because Jesus is shepherding him through the wise counsel more experienced mamas share with me and through men from church who also stand in the gap. Just this week, our beloved youth pastor agreed to pick him up from work to do their discipleship time on a different day to accommodate my son’s work schedule.

My fatherless son isn’t the only servant-hearted one in our home. He has a younger brother and four younger sisters — all of whom are in various stages of growing and learning. All of them homeschooled and all of them with their faces pointed toward Jesus.

Yesterday, my almost-15-year-old son cleaned up a huge coffee spill his Grampa made in the kitchen without being asked and he did it with a cheerful heart. He also clipped Grampa’s too-long nails and didn’t cringe. He takes on extra chores when asked without whining that it isn’t his job. And each week, in addition to school work, he prepares for his discipleship time with a young man from our church who is in the Air Force. Nick picks him up, takes him for coffee, they open their Bibles at Dutch Bros, and then Nick leads by example.

My fatherless daughters are still young, but my 9-year-old daughter shaves Grampa’s neck and head once a week and serves him 50 other ways every week.

My 10-year-old daughter single-handedly potty-trained her twin sisters 2 years ago and takes care of their wild ethnic hair like a pro every day — if their hair is done, it is because she did it.

Time will tell if my children continue to point their faces toward Jesus and follow Him with their whole hearts, but hope abounds for my fatherless, homeschooled children because they have a relentless Savior who loves them, forgives them, knows what they need, and makes a way for them in the wilderness. (Isaiah 43:16-19)

And my friends, that same Savior — Jesus the promised Messiah who is coming again soon — stands ready to do the same for every other boy and girl in America, homeschooled or not, fatherless or not, as well as every other person on this earth.

Nah, the school shooting problem isn’t about guns (we know there are plenty of other weapons being used to kill others).

It isn’t about “unsocialized” homeschoolers (such a joke).

It isn’t about being a boy (though our society is doing its level best to sissify our young men and confuse them about their gender’s role in the family).

It isn’t about boys being fatherless because there are plenty of sound role models who can influence our young men today — in the schools, in the Bible-teaching churches, and in homeschool groups across America.

It isn’t about boys seeing the society they are inheriting as completely divesting itself of responsibilities, honor, duty, loyalty, and sacrifice. (Although, this divestiture is happening at an alarming rate as we push the older generations into adult-orphanages and nod at them as we drive by, or support abortions of tiny humans while trying to save endangered species with more gusto than we are willing to exert for the unborn).

And it isn’t even about violent video games (though I hate them and wish people would stop tossing their hard-earned money at those companies that could care less if all that video gaming scrambles the user’s brain).

Nope.

Those are not the reasons for school shootings.

Our enemy is God’s enemy, Satan and the reason for an increase in school shootings and other lawlessness is that we have turned our faces away from Jesus as a society. We don’t expect Jesus to come again. We don’t want Him to be our Savior. We think we can save ourselves through good works and brute force.

My son, his siblings, and many, many other amazing young men and women (whom I know personally) know they need Jesus and turn their faces and hearts toward Him daily. That, my friends, is where it starts.

Seeds of Faith

“A father of the fatherless and a judge for the widows, Is God in His holy habitation.” Psalm 68:5

Jesus said, “I am the way, and the truth, and the life; no one comes to the Father but through Me.” John 14:6

Copyright © 2018 Deborah Rice, PeaPodFamilyPress

Giving thanks for the Not-So-Amazing Events

After all, it is Thanksgiving Season here in the United States.  Many people take this time to declare gratitude for the goodness in their own lives.

Wealth. Comfort. Health. Family. Friends. Freedom.

As one who is rarely content to follow the crowd, I haven’t been posting daily gratitude posts on social media.  Not everyone is given the blessing of wealth, or comfort, or health, or family, or friends.

And yet, I do enjoy reflecting and digging deeper.

Hmmm… there are so many amazing events in my life for which to be thankful, how could I possibly name just one?

As a momma of six ever-so-amazing children through the blessing of foster care and adoption, this is probably what most of my friends might expect me to choose as my answer. Truly each adoption was (and is) an incredible special event.

Or even better, as a follower of Jesus, some might expect me to select as a special event the day on which I “came to Christ” – using a common phrase in evangelical circles. But there isn’t one specific date for me to cite as I reflect on the journey that ultimately brought me to surrender all. Was it when I was 6 or 7 or 8 or 13 (or every other day in between when I dutifully prayed the prayer from fear)? Was it when I was 21 and felt a surge of regret and shame?  Was it when, bit-by-bit, I realized my depravity and my separation from God?  Yep, that’s probably it, but I don’t have a date on the calendar circled.

And then just like that, I realized that The Most Special Event of my life was preceded by a series of special events more commonly regarded as Not-So-Amazing Events that spared me from Horrible Events!

Today, it is for the Not-So-Amazing Events that I give thanks. 

I’m thankful for the reputation-destroying and near-death experiences when I was hanging out with a risky crowd of people because now I am able to more compassionately come alongside of others making similar choices and because I actually survived (!!!) and lived to love on 25 babies and adopted 6 precious and ever-so-amazing children.

I’m thankful for the fear-filled naysayers who attempted to negatively influence my decision to foster, adopt, and homeschool my children as a single momma. Painful as it was to endure their criticisms, the grains of truth were (and still are) that I am weak, it is a hard road, and I’m not able to do it all. BUT when God calls us to follow Him, He equips us to do it. (Romans 8:30) So, in my weakness and inability to do any of it alone, God’s grace and mercy are put on display every day as I and my ever-changing family enjoy every step of the journey… even the hard times are sweeter when we face them together.

I’m thankful that my youthful, ignorant attraction for bad boys did not result in a marriage that would certainly have been doomed; and that, in my still-singleness, my children and I daily experience the loving care of our Great God who promises He will never leave us or forsake us and demonstrates over and over that He really is a Father to the fatherless. (Psalm 68:5)

(See more of my thoughts on being thankful for being still single in one of my earlier blog posts at: https://peapodfam.wordpress.com/2010/11/20/an-uncommon-reason-to-be-thankful/)

I’m thankful for the seemingly good guys I dated who hurt my heart by leading me on and then rejecting me for my past.  Yes, in my eagerness (read: desperation) to be married, I put much stock in their opinions of me and drew my significance from them instead of drawing from the wellspring of God’s grace.  Yet, through those pain-filled experiences God has formed within me a strength of character seasoned with His wisdom and has been used to hone His gift of discernment that is useful in guarding my family, as well as in the way He uses me to minister to others.

I’m thankful for a broken leg when I was tobogganing at 17 years old that yielded an eventual escape from a traumatic path.  The life-long limp I have is a constant reminder that God rescued me from the hands of an abuser.

Although there is nothing wrong with being thankful for wealth, comfort, health, family, and friends, the truth is that not everyone has all, or even one, of those blessings right now. 

Many during this season are filled with despair as they compare their own lives with those proclaiming their blessings.  So today, I am proclaiming my gratitude for the Not-So-Amazing Events that spared me from Horrible Events. 

It is my prayer that those who are feeling desperate right now will remember that even the most desperate times, in the hands of our Loving Savior, are ultimately transformed into Amazing Events… God is able to bring beauty from ashes. (Isaiah 61:3)

And so most of all, I am thankful that while I was still an enemy of God (living through some awful stuff), He chose me, called me, brought me to repentance, and paid for my sins with the sacrificial blood of His only Son, Jesus, and is keeping His promises to transform me (sanctify me) day by day.

Seeds of Faith
“For while we were still helpless, at the right time Christ died for the ungodly. For one will hardly die for a righteous man; though perhaps for the good man someone would dare even to die. But God demonstrates His own love toward us, in that while we were yet sinners, Christ died for us. Much more then, having now been justified by His blood, we shall be saved from the wrath of God through Him.” Romans 5:6-9

“A father of the fatherless and a judge for the widows, Is God in His holy habitation.” Psalm 68:5

“To grant those who mourn in Zion, Giving them a garland instead of ashes, The oil of gladness instead of mourning, The mantle of praise instead of a spirit of fainting. So they will be called oaks of righteousness, The planting of the LORD, that He may be glorified.” Isaiah 61:3

“And we know that God causes all things to work together for good to those who love God, to those who are called according to His purpose. For those whom He foreknew, He also predestined to become conformed to the image of His Son, so that He would be the firstborn among many brethren; and these whom He predestined, He also called; and these whom He called, He also justified; and these whom He justified, He also glorified. What then shall we say to these things? If God is for us, who is against us?” Romans 8:29-31

Copyright © 2014 Deborah Rice, PeaPodFamilyPress

Twice-gifted boots and more to the story.

When God calls us to serve Him by serving others, we sometimes, erroneously, imagine a beautiful outcome of our sacrificial acts. Maybe we imagine these outcomes because we are too heavily influenced by Disney’s storybook endings or Marvel’s comic book heroism. Whatever the reason, by designing our own notion of what the outcome should be from our service we set ourselves up for disappointment and even disillusionment.

Let’s be clear, serving others doesn’t come with a neat-and-tidy storybook ending.

Serving others in need isn’t pretty or glamorous. Serving others can leave you scarred. (See what a friend wrote about this over at My Sister’s Jar.)

Answering God’s call to serve others can be downright dangerous and can send heart-wrenching ripple effects through an entire family or community. (Read Pastor Saeed’s letter to his daughter.)

Serving God by investing our time, energy, and money (which all belong to our God anyway) requires that we relinquish the right to know the rest of the story. This fact can be a good thing because even if we do know the outcome, we might not approve.

My post last week entitled Compassionate Wisdom: Training my children to serve others details the account of how my 14-year-old son served someone by giving away his socks and waterproof hiking boots right off his feet to a young, homeless man who was in dire need.

Ones just like these with the heel notch for better grip

My son listened to God’s call to serve another and responded promptly.

Later that same day, Josiah and I processed what God had done. I cautioned him against assuming his gift to this stranger would result in good as the world defines it. For example, I explained, it was entirely possible that this young man might sell the boots for cash to buy drugs. I wanted my son to grasp the truth that our role is to obey God’s call and relinquish any rights to the outcome of our service.

Ah, but sometimes… sometimes… we get to see a glimpse of the good that comes and how sweet it is.

God did something special this week and graciously allowed His servant Josiah to know what happened after he sacrificed his own socks and boots.

This week, as we made our way to care for our chickens, we stopped to deliver six homemade meals to the homeless we had gotten to know on our route. We found Hector and (providentially) 5 other homeless folks with him under a shade tree.

Josiah and I got out of the van to walk over to the group, but I could barely keep up with him. His strides were unusually bigger and I knew he was eager to see if Nicholas still had on the hiking boots that once were his.

When we arrived at the group, the look on Josiah’s face displayed disappointment. Nicholas was not one of the 6 homeless under that tree, but his disappointment didn’t last long.

Earl, one of the men who was present last week when Josiah gave away his socks and boots, enthusiastically greeted Josiah and told my son that Nicholas wasn’t with them because he got a job at the car wash. Earl shared that Nicholas commented that he knew it was because he had good, solid, waterproof boots!

Exhale joy!

On this particular day, by God’s providence, a young teen who is new in his journey of walking by faith not by sight, was granted a glimpse into the way God used his obedience. The twice-gifted boots have a new piece to their story and my precious first-born has a stone of remembrance as to God’s hand of grace and mercy toward him and toward those he is called to serve.

Yes, serving others can be messy, frightening, time consuming, and even scarring.

Thankfully, answering God’s call and sacrificially serving others can also be faith bolstering.

All good in the hands of our Sovereign God.

Seeds of Faith
“…for we walk by faith, not by sight.” 2 Corinthians 5:7

Copyright © 2014 Deborah Rice, PeaPodFamilyPress

Can a single-parent stay at home with the kids?

This summer during our state homeschool convention, I was honored to moderate a panel discussion on the topic of single-parent homeschoolers. The panel consisted of two moms who are still-single, one mom who is single by way of divorce, and one mom who is a widow.

Each of us found a variety of ways to support our families while remaining stay-at-home moms. The hard part for any single parent desiring to stay at home is our obvious concern for adequate income.

When I embarked on this single-mom, stay-at-home journey, I had two sons. I prayed and asked God for help. Then, I put the word out to all my friends that I was willing to do anything to earn an income as long as it was legal, moral, ethical, and allowed me to stay home with my children. I prayed often.

My income in the early years was pieced together through short-term jobs like delivering flowers on Mother’s Day (oh yes, the irony), stuffing convention folders for a marketing firm, counting words in essay papers as a qualifying filter for entries in an annual scholarship contest, in-home babysitting, freelance editing, and selling items online. My income was never consistent, but the odds-and-ends jobs provided me with what I needed with little time to spare.

This sort of income plan doesn’t inspire a feeling of stability and confidence, but that is exactly how I learned to lean on God for my every need.

He truly is a Father to the fatherless. (Psalm 68:5)

Eventually, the Lord allowed me to gain a more regular, at-home income by teaching online.

While we all come to the table of singleness in different ways and with different skill sets, we can all call upon the same God for His help.

I met a young, divorced mom many years ago. She told me that she felt called by God to homeschool and was grieved because in her mind this divorce meant she couldn’t be a stay-at-home mom. Her parents insisted that she wasn’t strong enough to stay home, homeschool, and earn a living. She admitted that she lacked the faith to step out and answer the homeschool call. I cannot determine if she lacked the faith or whether or not her desire to homeschool was born from God’s prompting, but I certainly was sad that her parents were so discouraging of her desire. She feared stepping out in faith and concluded that it was impossible for her.

God makes it clear to us that nothing is impossible with Him! (Luke 1:37)

The need to find a way to support our family can be viewed as a burden and we can stiffen our neck from bitterness that we have come to this point OR we can view the need as an opportunity to expand our homeschooling adventure by inviting our older children (and even the younger ones, depending on the job opportunity) to join us in earning an income to meet the family budget.

With that said, here is a short list of income ideas we discussed during the single-parent homeschooler workshop:

Online ventures – online teaching at the community college or university level, online ESL, writing, or math tutoring, e-zine creation and publishing, create and deliver homeschool enrichment courses such as music or art, or buy and sell via eBay.

At-home business ventures – pet sitting, daycare, overnight child care for 3rd shift parents, 4-H animal boarding (depending on your acreage), personal assistant, editing, writing, housecleaning, multi-level marketing sales, and lawn care.

I want to encourage every single parent (mom OR dad) to trust that if the Lord has called you to homeschool, then He will lead you. I have no idea HOW you will manage your income, but I am absolutely certain that if God is in, He will make a way where there seems to be no way.

He is your Provider and the Author and Perfecter of your faith. (Hebrews 12:1-3)

If putting your children in a public school needs to happen, remember that God is there with your children, too.

We need not fear. (Isaiah 41:10)

Without fear, but being sober-minded in our call to teach our children well while we have them under our wing, let us daily prepare them to be launched into a sin-sick world.

We are called to be in the world, but not of it! (Romans 12:2)

Luke 1:37
For with God nothing shall be impossible.

Psalm 68:5
A Father of the fatherless and a Judge for the widows, Is God in His holy habitation.

Hebrews 12:1-3
Therefore, since we have so great a cloud of witnesses surrounding us, let us also lay aside every encumbrance and the sin which so easily entangles us, and let us run with endurance the race that is set before us, fixing our eyes on Jesus, the author and perfecter of faith, who for the joy set before Him endured the cross, despising the shame, and has sat down at the right hand of the throne of God. For consider Him who has endured such hostility by sinners against Himself, so that you will not grow weary and lose heart.

Isaiah 41:10
‘Do not fear, for I am with you; Do not anxiously look about you, for I am your God. I will strengthen you, surely I will help you, Surely I will uphold you with My righteous right hand.’

Romans 12:2
“And do not be conformed to this world, but be transformed by the renewing of your mind, so that you may prove what the will of God is, that which is good and acceptable and perfect.”

Photo courtesy of lettersfrombarnabas.com

Copyright © 2014 Deborah Rice, PeaPodFamilyPress

An uncommon reason to be thankful

Today, during a time of fellowship with some of the women from church, we went around the brunch table and answered the question: For what can we give thanks?

I listened to others’ hearts and in the back of my mind wondered what, of the many blessings God has bestowed upon me, would I choose as the one blessing to share?

Isn’t it just like God to use an unexpected moment to change us – possibly set us upright again?

I thought how I am so thankful for Him saving me from my wretched lost condition in sin, or for my two amazing sons, or for all the many other children He has allowed me to momma through foster care, or for the blessing of getting to be home full-time with my children, or for the gift of being allowed to educate them at home. (In fact, yesterday we had one of those can-it-get-any-better-than-this?? kinds of school days and I was silently praising God for all He’s done in my family.)

When it came my turn to share, I started out with explaining to those who didn’t know me that as a single mom, I am amazed at all God has done for me and in our family. I am amazed at how He has taught us beyond a shadow of a doubt that although we do not have a father IN our home, we have a Father OVER (and indeed, IN) our home.

At that moment, my throat felt tight and my heart surged. I struggled to utter the next words that I had NO PLAN to speak. I knew it was the Spirit of the Living God prompting me.

With great difficulty, I half-mouthed, half-choked out the words, “I am thankful for being a single mom.”

For those of you who know me, you know how MUCH I have longed to be married, how I’ve longed for my sons to have an earthly daddy, and how I have come to a place where I am truly content with being single.

Today, God set me upright and showed me that being content is very different from being thankful.

Never, never have I been thankful for being a single mom.

In most normal Christian circles, being thankful for being a single mom would not be a socially acceptable detail for which to thank God.

Yet there I was, in the midst of all these married women surprising even myself. Thankfully, these are amazing women with dedicated lives for Jesus. I didn’t worry they would reject me for what I’d just shared. I knew they understood.

As soon as I uttered the words, it was time to move on to the next part of the program. There was no need to say anything more – and I couldn’t have, even if I’d wanted to, because I was so overcome with emotion at hearing what God’s Spirit prompted me to declare.

So at this time of Thanksgiving, I choose to be thankful that I am a single mom. May others around our family and serving our family see the goodness of our Great Heavenly Father who shepherds us and meets our needs for our good and for His glory. AMEN!

“The one who offers thanksgiving as his sacrifice glorifies me; to one who orders his way rightly I will show the salvation of God!” Psalm 50:23

“I give thanks to the Lord with my whole heart; I will recount all of Your wonderful deeds.” Psalm 9:1

Copyright © 2010 Deborah Rice, PeaPodFamilyPress

A tribute to my mom, Eunice

My mom, Eunice, has been with the LORD for over 7 years now. I still have moments when I think, “Oh, I can’t wait to tell Mom what the boys just said.” Or, when the girls left, how I longed to call my own mommy and cry on her shoulder.

When I was a little girl, Mom taught me to never say, “I’m bored.” She had a way of making sure my boredom was transformed into a cleaner bedroom, closet, or kitchen. I can honestly say I’ve never been bored a day in my life since discovering that there’s ALWAYS something constructive to do. This has contributed to my foundation of diligence in my own home, although I’m not sure my bedroom, closets, or kitchen would pass her inspection! And it has helped me to respond to my own children when they declare, “I’m bored.”

I learned to ask first before making plans with my friends. This has made it easier for me to remember to seek my Lord’s counsel before moving ahead with my own plans.

I learned to love the comfort of a warm robe fresh from the dryer as I stepped out of the bathtub on a cold winter’s evening. That might not seem like such a big deal, but mom was very frugal. Knowing that she would toss a single item into the dryer just for me warmed me inside and out. I felt wrapped in her love! That’s taught me that sometimes frugality can take a momentary backseat when there’s an opportunity to wrap one of my children in an act of love.

As a pre-teen, I also learned from my mom that hiking up my skirt to make it look like a mini-skirt, although done in secret, was something she would still find out about. I wondered at the time, “HOW does she do it??” Now I know! (One day, my sons will learn how I do it, but until then, I like that they marvel at this parental talent.)

I learned to put the safety of my children ahead of my own comfort when my mom taught me to change diapers in the church nursery. Back then, we still used cloth diapers and diaper pins. She taught me to put my hand between the pin and the baby. I protested, “But I might get poked, Mom!” She quietly replied, “That’s the idea, honey.”

As a rebellious teen, I learned from Mom that a mother’s love is not contingent upon any act of my own design. She simply loved me and waited for me to return to her, without any condemnation. Unconditional love is a priceless gift.

As a 19-year-old, living in Costa Rica, away from my family for the first time, I learned from Mom that little things like a piece of Big Red gum tucked into a letter can scream, “I love you, I’m thinking of you, and I miss you” without even one written word.

And although my mom went to be with Jesus when I was just becoming a mommy myself, she is present in so many moments of my day, every day.

Every time I cuddle my children around me and read to them. Every time I bake Mom’s famous cookie recipe just because I want to delight my children with fresh-baked goods. Every time I sing to them certain hymns which are deeply etched in my memory because of Mom sitting at the piano playing them over and over and over. Every time I discipline my children and send them off with a hug and a smile. Every time I read the Word to my children and have them do their penmanship work from Scripture. Every time my children and I stop to admire the tulips or gaze up at billowy clouds or pine for a ride upon hearing the sound of a train whistle. Every time I take a newborn into my home and kiss that wee stranger on the cheek. Every time we engage in so many other seemingly insignificant activities throughout the day, my mom’s signature is on so much of my mothering.

My mom was a gift. Even during that period in my life when I was sure she wasn’t, she really was.

If she were alive today, I would have found a way to be at her side and whisper to her again, “Thanks, Mom, you did a great job!”

Since I can’t do that, my lasting tribute to her is to raise my children to know all about their gramma, Eunice. (For example, I take them out to eat on her birthday every year and regale them with tales of their gramma.) And best of all, I carry on the traditions with my children that Mom instilled in me, traditions that constantly pointed my heart toward my Savior.

Thanks, GOD, for my mom, Eunice.

Her children arise up, and call her blessed . . .
Proverbs 31:28a

Copyright © 2010 Deborah Rice, PeaPodFamilyPress

We make our plans, but then life (lice?) intervenes: Part I

Yesterday I had small, quiet plans. Grind flour. Enjoy the aroma of healthy bread baking in my oven. Let the kids stay in their jammies all day. No school.

Yesterday was the girls’ last full day with us before leaving to go live with their biological mom for the first time in their lives.

Yesterday, in my mind’s eye, I’d pack their things little by little, sorting as I went along while the girls played in the backyard together with my sons who have been their brothers for almost 3 years. I’d take pictures of them laughing and I’d spend some time remembering how each of the girls came to us and what God had done in our lives while they’ve been with us. I planned this to be a time of quiet reflection as I soaked up the last hugs and kisses from my precious daughters Bethany (2) and Hadassah (1).

But today, that is not what happened. Instead, I spent the day addressing head lice.

Last week, while the girls were spending the weekend with their biological mom, I received a call from her telling me that wee Hadassah (21 months old) had a terrible case of head lice.

In over 10 years and 14 children, I’ve never, ever seen a case of lice. I didn’t know what to tell her to do.

The girls were due to come back to me early the following week for a last time with us and she assured me that she had thoroughly treated Hadassah and that Bethany didn’t have any signs. (I didn’t know enough to ask her if, for cautionary measures, she had gone ahead and treated Bethany anyway.)

So yesterday morning after breakfast, Bethany started itching furiously at the back of her head. I took her outside in the sunlight to see what I might see. I’d never seen a case of head lice before, but it wasn’t difficult to diagnose — tiny bugs were crawling all over her head.

Because bravery isn’t my strong suit, I burst into tears. This wasn’t the day I’d planned for our last day all together as a family of five.

Ms. G, Miss Lori, and Mrs. B came over and were great supports. (What dear, self-sacrificing friends!) Ms. G tended the wee ones while I and my sons bagged linens, clothing, stuffed animals, pillows, and comforters. Mrs. B went to the store and bought some lice treatment stuff. Miss Lori came over bearing an electronic comb that is designed to de-louse the head. The device survived one use on Bethany’s long hair. (If the girls were mine, I would have cut their hair into short bobs so we would have had less hair with which to contend. But it isn’t a freedom a foster mom gets to have.)

Today, instead of packing their clothes, I was bagging their stuff and our stuff into large, black garbage bags to take to the laundromat. And instead of one more night with us, I took them down to their biological mom’s in the afternoon so that I could get all their stuff on the way toward being de-loused.

Instead of watching them play and taking pictures of my daughters, I was focused on the laundry. Thankfully, my friends, my sons, and I did take time to gather round the girls to pray over them and then we dropped them off and headed straight to the laundromat.

Three and one-half hours later, we’d done a lot of laundry. We have more to do tomorrow and then the carpet cleaners are coming.

My boys and I don’t show any signs of the pesky critters, but I still treated us all last night anyway.

Well, we did have a nice breakfast together on Thursday. Our last one as a family of five.

B.G. and I sang, “Jesus, Jesus, Jesus in the mornin’ Jesus in the noon-time. Jesus, Jesus, Jesus when the sun goes down.” Only she says: “Gee-see-shush” and it makes that song all the more special.

My sons weren’t sad. They know we’ll see the girls again, God willing. Their mom is very agreeable to us remaining in their lives. But I’m still sad. I know this is the end of a very special chapter; one I thoroughly enjoyed. I need some grieving time and then I know that God will usher me into a place of solace.

I suppose I won’t have much time over the next week to miss the girls (several b-day celebrations, including Peter’s and mine). But sometime next week, when they don’t come home, I suppose it will settle in that they are truly gone.

I had my plans for today, but God allowed something else.

Proverbs 16:9 says:
The mind of man plans his way, but the LORD directs his steps.

Romans 8:28 says:
“And we know that all things work together for good to them that love God, to them who are the called according to His purpose.”

These are generous promises. I don’t have any insight into why this happened. And I don’t need to. I had my plans, but the LORD directed our steps differently today. I love GOD and am called according to His purpose, so I rest in the promise that all things (even dealing with lice) work together for good.

Copyright © 2010 Deborah Rice, PeaPodFamilyPress

We make our plans, but then life (lice?) intervenes: Part II

Holocaust survivor Corrie ten Boom wrote a now-famous book entitled The Hiding Place. Some of the details are sketchy for me and I can’t find my copy of her book to verify the specific vermin she mentioned. It was either lice or fleas. But either way they were vermin!

Here’s a quick summary of what she wrote about one situation in the concentration camp . . .

When Corrie and her sister Betsy were taken to a concentration camp during WWII, they discovered that their barracks were infested with lice. Betsy declared that out of obedience to God’s Word they were to give thanks to God for these bugs. Although Corrie was reluctant, she did join her sister in lifting praises to God.

In her book, Ms. tenBoom describes that the women in that particular barracks enjoyed unusual freedom to read the Bible and pray with the other inmates, in spite of how others were treated by the Nazi guards. Somewhere along the way, Ms. tenBoom realized that they were able to have such open worship and reading of the Word because the guards didn’t want to be subject to an infestation themselves. What a blessing the vermin infestation was for those women. (I encourage you to read more of Corrie ten Boom’s account of her time in the concentration camp and her ultimate rescue. Her story is one of great praise to our King and Messiah and an encouragement to those who suffer for the Kingdom.)

So after I spent the day Thursday silently grumbling about all the laundry and the need to cancel other plans, our precious Heavenly Father led me to His Word.

At about 9 p.m., when my sons were about ready to crash into bed from exhaustion, I sought their forgiveness for missing the opportunity to shepherd them to obey God’s Word with a voice of praise even in the midst of lice. (You can imagine the boys were a bit confused about this. Obviously I haven’t done a good job teaching them this spiritual discipline, nor have I done a good job modeling it. ** sigh **)

Well, I righted the wrong, repented before my King, and then my sons and I bowed before the Throne of Grace to praise Him in the midst of all that’s been going on this week. I also counseled my sons to consider the passages that I’ve listed below.

I hope that if you are facing a particularly painful time in your life, you will consider the words of our Creator-King and find comfort in these timeless truths.

Isaiah 55:8-9
For My thoughts are not your thoughts, nor are your ways, My ways,” declares the LORD. For as the heavens are higher than the earth, so are My ways higher than your ways and My thoughts than your thoughts.

Ephesians 5:20
Always giving thanks for all things in the name of our Lord Jesus Christ to God, even the Father.

I Thessalonians 5:18
In everything give thanks; for this is God’s will for you in Christ Jesus.

Colossians 3:17
Whatever you do in word or deed, do all in the name of the Lord Jesus, giving thanks through Him to God the Father.

Hebrews 13:15
Through Him then, let us continually offer up a)sacrifice of praise to God, that is, the fruit of lips that give thanks to His name.

AMEN!

Copyright © 2010 Deborah Rice, PeaPodFamilyPress

We make our plans, but then life (lice?) intervenes: Part III

Last night I prayed with my sons and thanked the Lord even in the midst of this infestation of lice and the loss of my daughters. I didn’t expect to see any practical blessing any time soon. It really was enough for me to simply obey God’s Word.

But today at the laundromat, I witnessed some incredible blessings.

I witnessed the transformation of my two young sons.

When did they turn a corner and become more responsible and diligent? Did I miss it because I was so busy focusing on two small girls who needed so much training?

Yesterday and today at the laundry, Josiah (10) was a machine as he helped load and unload the van; load and unload the washers and dryers; fold, count quarters, and so forth.

Peter (7) also worked hard. He needed a bit more prodding, but he was also more diligent than ever before.

Josiah asked what he could do to help, or simply did it without being told. He directed his younger brother with tasks he could accomplish.

To my surprise, Peter was taking big brother’s direction. It is true that many hands make light work!

While we waited for the laundry to dry, we worked on school work.

Peter was gobbling it up. He was on fire with his work and at one point I affirmed his school work and he declared, “I didn’t know I was doing school right now!” (Isn’t that when learning is most exciting ? When it feels like fun!)

Josiah practiced his penmanship (a grueling task for him), but he did so without complaint and all while keeping an eye on the dryer times.

At one point, one of the patrons (probably in his early 30’s) in the laundromat declared, as he watched my boys, that he wished his mom had taught him how to do the laundry because he was just now learning how to do it. I told the young man that I hoped my sons’ future wives would appreciate their husbands’ early years of training.

Later, another patron, just before she left, approached me with tears in her eyes and publicly praised my sons for their diligence and respect. Wow! She was actually almost openly weeping. I thanked her for her words of affirmation. After she left, one of my sons asked what their reward might be for having been recognized for their good behavior by a stranger. (** grin **)

My reply: “Treasures in Heaven, Son. Treasures in Heaven.” And I might have added, if I’d had the thought: “Your reward here, should our Savior tarry, is a wife who will honor you for the habit of hard work you do for your family.”

So there are blessings in having spent 2 days at the laundromat. I was able to see that my sons are growing and maturing. We pulled together, this small family of now three. And perhaps we were used by our LORD as a witness to one or more people of the beauty of obedience and training.

Mind you, a little later they were goofing off in the van and trying to smack each other in the head. I’m not living in a fantasy world. I know my boys will need more training (as do I!!) and sometimes it might even look like we’ve taken a step or two backwards. But after these past couple of days, I hope I’ll remember that even when I don’t notice, God is training my sons through my incapable hands and He is shaping their character through the refining fires He allows into our lives. Hallelujah!

Isaiah 54:13
All your sons will be taught by the Lord and great will be your children’s peace.

AMEN!

Copyright © 2010 Deborah Rice, PeaPodFamilyPress